Distributed social networks…

This is stolen unabashedly from here. I love these “form rejection letters” which come in so many different versions 🙂

Your post describes a

( ) protocol ( ) github repo ( ) manifesto ( ) kickstarter

for a distributed social network.

Your idea will not work. Here is why it won’t work.

One or more of the following flaws may apply to your particular idea.

( ) You think “if you build it, they will come”

( ) All of the other social networks with more users, developers, time, and money

( ) “Users want to own their data” is an ideology not a use-case

( ) Public keys are not a magic wand to make security issues disappear

( ) Social problems dominate the technical ones

( ) People use email for that

Specifically your design fails to account for

( ) Scale

( ) Adoption

( ) That popularity is a Distributed Denial of Service attack

( ) Malicious Denial of Service attacks can happen too

( ) Only supporting ASCII or Latin-1 is racist

( ) HTTP Caching and Load Balancing

( ) Timezones are a necessary evil

( ) So is Unicode

( ) NAT Traversal

( ) Federation exists already

( ) DNS is still centralized

( ) Cross-site-scripting and SQL Injection are not features

( ) Further fragmentation will not solve interoperability

( ) Spam

and the following philosophical objections may also apply

( ) Character limits are the QWERTYUIOP of messaging

( ) Your homebrew markup is a tragedy of regular expressions

( ) Your understanding of HTTP and Representational State Transfer, is as informed as a youtube comment

( ) If it can’t be used for piracy, it isn’t decentralized enough

( ) You are proposing a new central point of failure

( ) OAuth. Now you have two problems

( ) OAuth2. The SOAP of Authentication

Furthermore, this is what I think about you:

( ) Sorry, but I don’t think it would work.

( ) This is a stupid idea, and I am going to make fun of you on a centralized social network.

( ) I will enjoy watching your dreams fall into obscurity and regret. I have popcorn.


#Funny #rejection letters