Static electricity king

When I’m walking around work, I build up a fair bit of static electricity. It’s something to do with my shoes or my hair or something to do with how amazing I am I guess - but I build up a LOT of charge just walking a few steps. It’s mainly to do with the makeup of the soles of my shoes, since they are doc martens which have a plastic/rubber sole that’s good at building up a charge. Sometimes when I discharge (generally on things like the metal frames of doors and the cubicles) it can make quite a cracking noise, and sometimes even make quite a twitch in the muscles of my hand. It’s quite dangerous at times, hurting people if I accidentally (or intentionally) discharge through some part of their body. Then there’s this guy - the king of static electricity. Wow, I bow down to him.